Facebook Ads: “We can make it look like an accident”

I really enjoy watching Facebook ads flounder with my relatively anonymous “incomplete” account.

Why would anyone not complete their Facebook profile? Why don’t I want people to reach me? People could be trying to reach you right now. Why won’t you reach back? Why are you such a cold monster?!

What possible reason could I have? WHERE ARE YOU AND WHAT ARE YOU DOING OH GOD IT BURNS!!

Here’s today’s best guess:

Nailed it.

Or… wait. Do they need to be more specific?

Always be specific kids. Also don’t do, or sell, drugs.

But…

…if you do…

Facebook knows a guy.

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