Why do something smart when you could do something stupid?

I’m an idiot.

I was at the gym on Tuesday, and I overextended my arms on one of the weight machines (<-this is my retrospective best guess). So my joints were a little achey yesterday. So what did I do today? Oh you betcha — I went to the gym and overextended my arms on one of the weight machines, again. Cuz if you’re not certain you’ve injured yourself, it’s best to go back, do exactly the same thing, and make sure you’re hurt.

I’m such a moron. And now I’m a moron with an arm that won’t straighten all the way. I’m stuck partway through an underarm pirate “ahoy matey” swing.*

*It’s important to frame your injuries so’s they amuse you.

Trial by fire.

So, as some of you know, I decided to join my Muay Thai class for their group run tonight.

I’ve been avoiding this, as they’re fit fuckers and I am not a runner, and I could do my best but it might be wicked hard. Plus, it’s winter, however mild, and it’s hard to run in the city in the cold.

Right. So I went because I thought I had to – because the timing of the beginner class overlapped with the 1/2 hour of running. 1 hour class, 1/2 hour run.

It turns out not so much. It turns out that only 5 people went on the run – 4 senior guys (including two instructors), plus me.

w00t.

So I did good, did good, did good. For the first .75 K? Then I started feeling a little tired, but I took a short walk break, then caught up to them. They were encouraging (without being sappy), and we kept going. I made it down the hill a few more streets. Then I started feeling not so good. Like, gagging a couple of times. It’s cool I thought, I just need to ease up a bit. And then my new favourite person in the whole world (”Dad”) slowed down to keep pace with me. Interestingly, ’Dad’ was one of the guys who, on first impression, I thought was wicked tough and probably sort of mean.

Usually someone keeping pace would drive me crazy, I don’t like holding people back, and I keep my own pace – I push myself. But ’Dad’ was really good to run with. Encouraging without being motivational speakery (”Those fuckers up there have all been through this, and Kru says leave no one behind.”). Very cool. But I was definitely struggling. Walk. Run. Walk.

Then he pointed out that we were doing the long run. Apparently the route one of the guys chose (remind me to beat on him with a stick) for that night was about twice as far as usual (5K vs. 2K). Awesome. Did I mention how I’m not a runner? He said I was doing good, and that he had been struggling way before now on his first run.

Did I mention how he’s my new favourite person?

So then I started gagging again. We were past the halfway mark (4ishK), but still had a long way to go to get back. And I thought, okay, take’er easy. Then we got to the hill. Let’s just get to the top of this hill we both said. And I was soo on board. I’m a determined little bastard and I wanted to get up that hill. So I did what a friend of mine called ”Soldiers in Siberia-ing” up it. Got to the top. Gagged. Gagged. Started to throw up in my hand. Realized I was going to seriously toss some cookies. But where was I? At the corner of cement and concrete that’s where. Having never thrown up outside before, I was new at this. What to do. What to do. I hightailed it over to one of those straggly looking Toronto trees where the base is covered by cement – but with a tiny piece of dirt showing.

Or it was, before I hurled all over it.

Lovely.

’Dad’ was fantastic about it. Very cool, like this was totally normal. I said ”Excuse me” when I got back, and he was all ”hey I’ve got a 3 1/2 year old, you should see the things that come out of her”.

And then there’s a whole thing where my stomach was just *churning*, but I’ll spare those details. Suffice it to say that I was looking for emergency pitstop places all the way back.

So – some kind of initiation? Maybe. From maybe that one guy who knew there was a n00b in the group and decided to ’push’ me. Whatever. ’Dad’ and all the rest of the guys who had run were very cool and much warmer than usual when I got back (that’s a fun sentence). Patting me on the back saying ’good run’, bowing. It was like a family. Cool. What a crazy place.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go and lie very still now. 🙂

Mixed Messages

I’m going to physio for my knee. So it would be really helpful, and nice for the big money I’m shelling out, to have the various physios be consistent in what I’m supposed to be doing. Heck, I’d settle for consistent in what the problem is.

Doctor: Your patellas are really moveable in all directions, which means that they slide all over your knee. Which is good because you have a wide range of motion, and bad because your tendons have to work extra hard all the time.

Physio 1: You are really tight on that one side of your knee, so your patella always slips in to the inside when you walk.

Physio 2: Your knee movement when you walk is fine, there doesn’t seem to be anything to worry about there.

Doctor: Ice your knee 4x a day, and take 2 advil twice daily with food.

Physio 2: It’s really stupid to bother icing your knee, it won’t make any difference.

How about a little harmony here people? I mean, *you all work in the same office*. Sit down together, say once a week, just have a coffee, a little chat ferchrissakes…