As Kate @ AH described it “It’s Water! Now with HFCS!”.
What is it? Well read Wegman’s product description to find out:
“Sensible Solution: Low calorie; Helps hydrate kids. Finally, a great tasting water beverage kids will love to drink! Tip: Consuming 5-8 servings (8 fl oz each) of fluids per day is recommended by health professionals.”
What is it? Why it’s Capri Sun Roarin’ Waters Fruit Flavored Water Beverage.
Helps hydrates kids? Water beverage? Fuck. If you have fatass bastard kids who won’t drink water, then beat them, don’t add sugar. And how fucking irresponsible to put a “tip” trying to associate this goodfornothing product with health professionals.
Okay fine, don’t beat your kids. But don’t “hydrate” them with sugar water. They really really really won’t drink water? Well then how about watered down fruit juice. Anyone? Anyone?
“Adding sugar, it’s working well for us so far America.” (slash Canada)
Worst of all this is not an isolated product, but part of an emerging (and fucking disturbing) new trend to add the worst kinds of sugar (crystalline fructose, aka the bad HFCS, plus HFCS regular) to water and then try to pass it off as a health drink. Fucking. Disturbing. and. Fucking. Shameful.
See also:
* Glacéau (read: Coke)’s bullshit VitaminWater, plus vitaminenergy and fruitwater
“The success of the Glacéau brand launched a new marketing category in the beverage industry: enhanced water. Glacéau’s slogan is ‘hydrate responsibly’. ”
Thanks Glacéau, for coming up with a slogan that advocates against your own product. Numbnuts.
(Lots of swearing in this post? Only just enough I think.)